STD's (Shit To Do)

Hey ya'll,

It is soo time for my rant of the day...

I am in a mood and Im so scared because for the first time in my life Im uncomfortable and have no idea what to expect next..

I invited a few friends over to hang out and have some fun.. And of course some folks I know by association (thx Ree) came too.. We'll I drank way too much and some how my ipod was stolen.. Now I am a firm believer in Karma and in my life I have stolen.. From stores.... Never from a friend or a friend of a friend..

As I said I believe in karma and what you put out you will get back.. So this maybe me getting back the vibe I put out.. However, this whole situation has me on edge.

What happens when you dont feel safe in your home anymore?

The kicker is I was told to move awhile back and I didnt..
I dont trust folks anymore...

I mean you allow people to come into your space and they steal from you...
How do you keep faith in people after that.. I feel so violated...

Anybody that really knows me knows.. I would give you the shirt off my back if I could... Why would you steal from someone who invited you into their space..

I just dont know.. You think you know people but you really dont..

So I have officially posted a sign on my door.. it say's I have STD's

SHIT TO DO.. Go Away.. Because I dont know how to feel right now... I have tears in my eyes because my heart hurts..

My ipod is something that I hold dear because it was given to me... and if the person really wanted it I would have brought them one..

So I titled this post because I really have some shit to do in myself..

I have decisions to make and not alot of time to do it in..

So I pose the question to you do you have STD's ???

Something To Ponder

Howdy Kids ! Im back and tired... Why because I just finished jumping double dutch for two hours.. It is amazing the things you do that can trigger moments of sadness...

Yes a simple game of double dutch triggered sadness..

Why you ask because today was the first day I saw my wasted youth.....

I began to think of all the wasted opportunities, and all of the time I've wasted..

And began to get teary eyed... Because the last time I really jumped some double dutch I was 14.. Im 29 now.. And I have learned a lot but not enough.. I have wasted so many chances to change the world. It's really a sad and strange thing..

I know that most people would like to change one or a few things about their lives.. But me I would just like to start each day with how I felt today while jumping rope..

I want to live my life through the eyes of wisdom.. But not just any kind of wisdom.

I want the wisdom to complain less because it could always be worse..
The wisdom to get enough rest because this is the only body I have..
The wisdom to love whom I choose.. because love is the best action I could ever show.

The wisdom to speak my mind because Im allowing spiritual rape each time someone commits an injustice against me and I dont speak up for myself..

It's March already and I still dont know what this year holds for me... But i know my life changed today as I jumped double dutch at 29.....

Thanks for reading my rant.... This Buddhist quotes matches how I feel and how Im going to live my life..


To be idle is a short road to death and to be diligent is a way of life; foolish people are idle, wise people are diligent.
Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn't learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn't learn a little, at least we didn't get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn't die; so, let us all be thankful.

Somethings We Just Dont Do

Hey it's time for my daily rant...

Ok so I have a associate who does dumb shit to annoy me.. He is supposed to be one of the kids however.. He keeps pushing up on me... Like he is my dude.. Now how do you tell your "gay associate" that you dont think their gay??? Im mean my friends know that I love to be around over the top type folks.. But this one throws me for a loop.

Can you be fully gay and like the opposite sex... Wouldnt that make you bi?? right?


But hey Im not in to labels.. but if y'all just happen to turn on the news and see my face.. I have just murked my gay/straight confused friend.. Cause he's pushing my buttons... lol...

And Only one person can push my buttons... he knows who he is..

What is Church?

Many of my blogs are extensions of great thought provoking conversations I have had with my super smart friends..

Hence today's topic.. What is church? Or Better yet What is spirituality?


Now this is coming from a former pastor's wife worship leader and minister in training.. So When I say I've been there and done that and brought a t-shirt I really
mean it..

Now on to the questions at hand..

Now I come from a christian background, which strengthened once I entered my early twenties. And I was always taught being a Christan was the right thing to do and to be.

However, I have always had thoughts/interests of what the inner working of other beliefs were. Simply put how can I preach against something if I didn't know or have first hand knowledge.

Like some people teach that it's wrong to teach Karma (which is largely a Buddhist thought) The Sanskrit word Karma (or kamma in Pali) literally means action. In Buddhism however, karma mainly refers to one's intention or motivation while doing an action.
The shortest explanation of karma that I know is: 'you get what you give'. In other words; whatever you do intentionally to others, a similar thing will happen to yourself in the future.
Our largest obstacle to understanding or even believing in karma may be time. The 're-actions' or results of our actions show up with a time delay, and it becomes extremely hard to tell which action caused which result. Actions done in a previous life can create results in this life, but who can remember their past life? For ordinary humans, the mechanisms of karma can be intellectually understood to some extent, but never completely "seen taken from http://buddhism.kalachakranet.org/karma.html

But the bible teaches if you dig a ditch for someone dig one for yourself as well and it says what you reap( put out) you will sow (get back).. So is it wrong to teach karma? I think not..

Im at a point in my life now that I question everything and I'm looking for answers to my questions. And Im going to find out something..

I was told that I needed deliverance from my way of thinking.. And that I needed to "get back to God" now that's is cute for all of the christian novices out there.. But I pose this question what if Im the free one and are the bound one? What if this is were "God" needs and wants me to be?

Any thoughts?? Should you question your faith or should you just believe?



Now to keep this post interesting it will be in parts.. (And I dont want to straining your eyes and then trying to sue me) but I do want to know your thoughts. and please remember this is a place to free your thoughts and express your self.


Until my next post..

Smooches.. and that is for the Children..

Movies To See

I saw a movie this weekend that made me miss my musical muse (aka my sweetness)

This movie made me laugh and cry ! And I loved it so... but it made me look at movies a different way and it sparked an interesting convo between the person I watched it with..

The movie was PS I Love You. Here is a very brief outline of the movie..
On a country road in Ireland over ten years ago, it was love at first sight for Holly, a lost young tourist (Academy Award® winner, Hilary Swank), and Gerry, a charming local lad (Gerard Butler). Hollys formidable mother, (Kathy Bates), disapproved of the couple, concerned that her spirited daughter was too young for marriage. In the years since, the once fearless Holly has become unsure of her own identity. When Gerry dies with a brain tumor and leaves Holly a widow just shy of her thirtieth birthday, her family and best friends (Lisa Kudrow, Gina Gershon) are concerned that she will never emerge from her takeout container-strewn Manhattan apartment. After weeks holed up watching old movies, a birthday cake and tape recording message from Gerry mysteriously arrives, marking the beginning of a series of letters instructing her to perform unusual requests. With the help of her girlfriends, Holly begins a year of wild adventures and a life journey that Gerry has planned for her, helping her to discover who she is without him and reminding her - p.s. I Love You.



P.S. I Love You is based on the best-selling novel by Cecelia Ahern.


Now if you haven't seen this movie you should..

I asked the question why aren't black actors/actress' offered this type of role/movie..
And when it comes to sexual under/overtones of a character African americans are portrayed as lustful, barbaric beasts but their white counterparts are shown to be passionate and caught up in the moment???

I also wondered which of our black actors could have pulled off this type of role...

Just a little something to make you say hmmmmmm ..

until my next rant..

Smooches darlings!

Bad Credit

I just had a thought...

What if you judged the people in your life based on their credit scores?


How would your veiws on your circle of people increase or decrease?


What tools would you use to either grant or deny credit?

Hey just a thought......